Love Leadership
Leadership expert Katherine Farnworth explains why asking open questions gets important feedback
In the last edition, we spoke about coaching and its importance in increasing engagement. Coaching is less about ‘telling’, more about ‘asking’. In fact, coaching is asking questions in a structured way to achieve a goal. The most common model is Sir John Whitmore’s GROW model (Goal, Reality, Options and Way forward).
Importantly, as a ‘coaching manager’, you can take the weight off your shoulders and speak less. During a coaching conversation, which can be formal or informal, short or long, the manager should only be speaking approximately 25 per cent of the time (it doesn’t take long to ask a question), whilst your direct report, the ‘coachee’, can be encouraged to speak at least 75 per cent of the time. This also encourages ownership.
So what about ‘giving’ feedback through ‘asking’ open questions? If you do, it encourages the recipient to feel more respected, involved and allows them to take responsibility. Most managers would prefer their teams to ‘step up’.
So, imagine the traditional way of giving constructive (aka negative) feedback. Let’s choose a simple example of someone being late and use the EEC model (Example, Effect, Change). The typical scenario is a manager does all the talking, tells the individual they are late (Example), possibly the impact (or Effect) on the rest of the team and the Change that needs to happen in order not to be late again (as if the individual doesn’t already know). This ‘parent-child’ approach can encourage a defensive response.
Let’s change this to a more ‘adult-adult’ approach, through the use of asking open questions. Simple questions such as ‘What time did you arrive? (Example), What is the impact (Effect) on your colleagues when you are late? How does that make you feel? What can you do (Change) to ensure you will be here on time? How can I help for example can change the dynamics of the conversation.
Having to articulate them, the impact on their own colleagues can be more impactful. And identifying their own solution encourages buy-in. Okay, to give feedback this way, through asking open questions, can feel a little stilted at first, but persevere. Asking questions becomes a natural conversation, it gives people a voice and allows people to be heard, even during a challenging conversation. This is appreciated.
It is also useful for positive feedback, which should be given more often than constructive feedback, although both can be helpful if delivered well. Asking questions allows the individual to think about, and identify, what they did well, and how they can possibly ‘continue’ – rather than ‘change’ – that great performance. Encouraging this analysis, rather than simply telling someone, allows people to start focusing on their strengths in a much more self-sufficient way, slowly building confidence, based on evidence.
Feedback, either constructive or positive, done well, has been shown to increase employee engagement, improve the perception of fair treatment and the leadership capability of the manager. And it’s received even better when the manager themselves asks their team for feedback every now and then.
